Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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