I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
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