Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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