so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
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We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
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It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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