I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
