Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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