i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Randomize
