there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
