I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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