god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
