I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize