White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
