i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
