right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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