I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
