Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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