i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
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