There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
they call him Oral-B. enough said
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
