I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary