i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.