remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize