How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I am mentally ready for anal.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
