I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
farters have to be the big spoon...
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
