then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
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found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
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BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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