If i come over, it means nothing
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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