if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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