32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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