my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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