yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I skipped work to stalk him.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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