Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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