Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
