i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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