Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize