I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Randomize