Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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