Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Randomize