i need an iv and a liver transplant
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
