There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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