I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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