i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
