He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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