I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
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