dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize