The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
3pm strippers are depressing
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
