Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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