sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
