The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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