There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
