no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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