so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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