Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
