I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
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